How about Right Now?

Are you a planner, or a more spontaneous sort of person?

I am working to cultivate more of a "Do It Now" sort of life. 

This doesn't come as easily to me as, say, planning. Or procrastination.

Instead, I am accustomed to working things out in detail ahead of time regarding most of my actions: what, when, where, how, who... I choose to participate in a number of community initiatives, volunteer efforts, and organizations that rely on me for various deliverables: words, professional work, advisement, supplies, and ritual endeavors. Consequently, I do a lot of scheduling, list-making, outlining, and double-checking. Sometimes, I overthink something so much that I just let it go on and on without ever fully taking shape.

With all of this preparation and contemplation, I occasionally make myself nervous. I start to buy in to the structures I am building for myself as though there was some way, by worrying enough, to ensure that all will go off without a hitch.

Learning to be more spontaneous shows me a different kind of nervousness. "What if I walk into something unprepared and it really goes badly? What if I forget something critical? What if everyone else is super-prepared and I'm not?"

Finding a middle ground between these two extremes involves mindfulness. Paying attention to what is happening Right Now helps. Right Now helps me get past all the stories I might be telling myself about what is supposed to happen next. Right Now gives me the chance to breathe. Right Now is the antidote to "I'll do it later" in some cases.

Right Now is not a substitute for a plan, when a plan is really necessary. Right Now does not replace being careful. Right Now does not absolve me of having to clean up my messes when things go wrong, either. Right Now is not an escape. But Right Now IS a help when my focus has become diluted or convoluted by overthinking, or frantic energy, or fearfulness. Right Now is a micro-meditation. When I have gotten away from myself, Right Now brings me back to the moment, which is but a precious wisp, like a snowflake, then gone. How many glorious Right Nows have I missed because I was flying into the future, mentally, or lingering in the past, emotionally? Well, I won't dwell on it, but instead, I will begin to breathe Right Now, and pay attention, instead.

How about you? Where are you, how are you, Right Now?

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